the end is the beginning is the end

With regard to breaking silence and revealing through drafts and possibly published posts true and personal disclosures now in the places I left questions, or oddities, or built to be secret and secure, like where this is being written. The things I had to worry about are different now.

What would sound like paranoia or inflated self-importance and impossibly grandiose well, just doesn’t matter.

as its all now dead, stolen, whatever the thing is I was worried about in each case one way or another it wasn’t about out running, or outsmarting or anything so simple it was kind of like fate like those terrible b movies “final destination” there simply was no way around what was fated to be. I never would have believed that because it removes my ability to control that which is most important, but im not so sure about anything after all thats happened. And to be honest it feels now like an ending not a fight anymore and in any case there really is no way to look at it other than that I lost miserably.